We played alot of board games as kids. It all stems from being trapped in the house during a long winter. In fact we usually got a few new ones every Christmas.
However, learning the rules of 'Snakes and Ladder' or 'Sorry' did nothing except make us take pleasure in the misfortunes and failures of others. I usually didn't care who won in the end except when we played one game.
As we moved up the game ladder we learned how to crush poor people in 'Monopoly'(where I must always be the magic hat or I don't play), but no game was ever better for inducing tears than 'RISK'.
You all know the set up. Your armies and the other player's armies compete with dice to control all the countries of the world. Fitting for a person like me who likes the idea of a world under my benevolent control.
I had rules however. I refuse to play with anyone (especially students on field trips) unless they understood that I would, at one point in the game, make them cry.
I would promise them the world but in the end I would back stab them, take their cards and then proceed to take from them any nations I choose. Every alliance was a lie and every ounce of my focus was on stomping my enemies into the dust. If you tried to be my friend you would usually be the first to go.
I dreamed of a version of the game where I could make a wall hanging out of my enemy's skin just as an example to the others who would dare attempt to take my lands.
It's the only game I am like this with. Hell, I slip money to the losing players in 'Monopoly' all the time - but 'RISK' is different. 'Risk' is life.
When I played with my adult friends on 'games night' it usually took a few days for them to forgive me. Like the children they went into the game fully understanding my lack of compassion for my opponents. They also had the added humiliation of hearing me hum the tune to 'The World Is Not Enough' by Garbage as I collected their armies and added them to my own.
I will play your 'Boggle' and 'Yahtzee' and 'Milles Bourne' and I will be your bitch, your huckleberry and thank you for the fun night out.
However, don't bring out the Risk board unless you want to walk the 'trail of tears' and see a side of Big Daddy that isn't my prettiest. I have many un-attractive sides, but that one is my worst.
