I was thinking just now about a comment Dr Monkey left on a post of mine about how I am obsessive in my blogging (He didn't say it was a bad thing). It gave me pause to think. Do I really give to much time to this blog and my other writing projects and is that a bad thing overall to my life and my happiness? I spend so much of my day writing and looking at things around the internet that when I see something that interests me I just have to post about it. To me, its like having a conversation with someone that is living with me (something that will NEVER happen since no one ever loved me that much). Since for the most part I am alone in my world I surely would have died by now having to keep everything inside my own head because I wasn't able to have an outlet for my passions and opinions. For example, today some really awesomely fucked up things happened on the UK version of Big Brother. I am dying to talk with someone about it who knows the show like I do. Can you imagine how frustrating and lonely that makes a person feel? I have no unexpressed thoughts in my head and maybe that is a bad thing but I have come to accept that its the 'magic that is me'. Just look how one word got this post started. I have no problem keeping up with my prolific pace and I am sure that many people see it as a bad thing. Like maybe I should get a life..a real life. But trust me, my life online is so much better than my life ever was in the real world. I feel like I have been blessed with having the financial freedom not to have to go to work everyday so I can devote my time to things I care about. Online I feel that I actually have people to talk to and share things with...things that we both find interesting. None of my real world friends ever were into action figures or cartoons or comic books or television to the degree that I am. None of them share my hatred for the cephalopods (okay that one I admit to being obsessive over). I have no interest to talk sports all the time if ever. At my age its a waste of my time to interact with people who don't 'get' me. That may have worked when I was younger but it doesn't now. I have written a book and three graphic novels in the past year aside from constantly posting on my blog. I made a promise to my father when he died that I would take at least a year and do what I always dreamed of doing. I feel I have fulfilled that promise to him. I know if he was still with me he would be all over this blog stuff. The man knew a good thing when he saw it. In a way this entire effort is a tribute to him. Thank you Dr Monkey for giving me an honest diagnosis. In defending myself I have found the strength not to care what other people think. Like the lesson I learned from Riess over at Geek Orthodox, I don't write for anyone else but myself. When others appreciate that effort its icing on the cake.
